The College Drinker’s Alphabet

A- Alcohol: The key to surviving college.

B- Beer: It’s whats for dinner.

C- Class: What you’re supposed to get up and go to after a Thursday night party.

D- Dancing: A favorite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic.

E- Emergency: The keg is empty or there is no one over 21 in your drinking party.

F- F*cked Up: Signified by leaning over a toilet puking your guts out.

G- Games: Anything that involves cards, quarters and chugging beers.

H- Hang-over: Reminds you of how great last night was and how much you drank.

I- Ignorant: The way you act after drinking WAY too much.

J- Jail: Where you’ll end up after trying to use a fake ID or stagger home.

K- Kissing: What you’ll do to anything that moves after 15 beers.

L- Lord: Person you beg to get you out of every situation involving alcohol.

M- Money: That which you no longer have due to too much partying.

N- Not Again!: What you scream when you wake up beside someone you don’t know.

O- Oh shit!: What you say as you’re falling down the stairs.

P- Pee: What you have to do every five minutes while you’re drinking beer.

Q- Quilt: What you puked on last night in bed and have to clean in the morning. YUCK!

R- Reform: What you promise god you will do while you’re puking in the toilet.

S- Sex: What you did with that person you met last night while you were drunk.

T- Twenty-four: The number of beers it takes to get drunk.

U- Underage: Most of the drinking population in college town.

V- Vodka: The mother of all alcohols and the best way to make Jello.

W- Worm: The part of Tequila that that you don’t mind eating after you’ve consumed the whole bottle.

X- X-Ray: How they can see into your stomach before they pump it.(detox)

Y- Yourself: The one who drinks WAY TOO MUCH every week-end.

Z- Zima: Zomething Different.

You Know You’ve Been In College Too Long When… Ways To Get Thrown Out Of Chemistry Lab

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